My exercise schedule:
Wake up and tell myself I will workout today. Consider working out in the morning … then right after lunch … okay after the kids are in bed.
I decide to put it off until tomorrow. It’s the thought that counts right.
Watch The Biggest Loser .. okay, I did this once … about 6 months ago. That counts too, right!
And here is a fair estimate of my food intake:
Consider eating oatmeal today.
Make a Chai latte while contemplating this.
Forget to eat breakfast.
Remember haven't eaten and throw some bread in the toaster or wait for Jay to cook up a plate full of bacon.
Oh, you want chicken nuggets & chippies kids. Okay
Pasta. Mmmmm. Delish. Should really have a tomato based sauce with this. On second thoughts, let’s have cream and workout after dinner … yeh right.
Chocolate covered strawberries. Chocolate covered raisins. Chunky Monkey ice-cream. Chocolate cupcakes. Chocolate chip cookies. Chocolate.
Now, all of the above I wrote out in a draft blog post a month ago. I’ve seen it sitting in my drafts folder each and every day that I’ve blogged about something else. Last week I’d finally had enough of seeing it and after realizing that I still hadn’t worked out or stuck to anything vaguely resembling a diet I decided it was time to do something about this.
After all, hubby will be home next month. He’s lost about 40lbs. I’ve gained about 10lbs on top of what I already had to lose when he left a year ago. *sigh*. Now I have 20lbs to lose. *double sigh*
So last week I enlisted the help of the wonderful Coach Jenn at Team Beachbody and the on-line forum Bookie Boo to help get me motivated.
On Sunday I weighed myself. I gained a pound. What, so you can’t just join a forum and enlist the help of a coach and lose weight. Huh! Why didn’t anybody tell me that? Oh wait, they did, I just had my fingers in my ears at the time while shoving my face into a big plate of chocolate cake.
So this week I decided it was time. Time to get myself motivated and actually try to lose the wretched weight that has been plaguing me for the past 2 1/2 years and forcing me to not fit into any of my pretty summer dresses without the help of a shoe horn to stuff myself in.
Today I worked out. I went back to my old stroller class. It had been so long (maybe 6 months) since I had been last and I didn’t recognize one single person there and there was a new instructor. Good grief. These girls looked fit. I nearly hightailed it back to the car, but no, I forced myself to keep on plugging along.
I knew though after the first 2 minutes I should have listened to my instincts and gone home. Today was jogging day. Jogging and walking for 1 hour. Jog for 2 minutes, walk for 1. Are they crazy. Who can jog or walk for that long besides fit people. I thought this class was for lazy, slow, overweight people like me who’ve had babies and haven’t seen exercise in a loooooong time. I thought wrong. The first street I managed to keep up. We rounded the corner into the second street and I was trailing along behind. Way behind. We rounded the corner into the third street and I caught up to the rest of the mummies doing squats, jumping jacks and leg lifts. After running. I managed a couple of squats, thought I may pass out and feigned feeding my kids to avoid anymore. Then off they went running again. After the 2 minutes of running … which I lasted about 10 seconds of, this is what I saw.
No-one. Absolutely no-one.
I rounded the next corner:
At about this point, they stopped for another workout. I thought I may have a heart attack and wondered if the nice policeman driving past me might give me a lift back to my car. Then realizing that I was not going to catch up anytime soon, they turned around and walked back to me so I could ‘catch up’. Can anybody say HUMILIATING. Because I can. I must have muttered it about 30 times under my breath. After a very short walking spurt of clearly not 1 minute (in my, by now, delirious mind) they were off and running again. Was this ever going to end? With the blink of an eye they were gone.
Gone! Gone! Gone! Nowhere to be seen!
Thankfully I had a fair idea of how to get back to the starting point where they were all WAITING FOR ME.
Anissa and Amanda you had better be there on on Monday, or I may cry. I need someone to walk with me. It was great to see you at the Health Fair today even though neither of you smelt like sweat and humiliation.